Hectic.

*Phoebe stumbles into her room and closes the door. She looks absolutely exhausted.*

Phoebe) Hope, never again am I going to a Crittermas party. Never.

Hope) Er... wanna chocolate?

*Suddenly there is a loud crash and the door is pulled off it's hinges!*

 Phoebe) It's a push door, dumbo.

*She Phases just encase and turns to see who has been stupid enough to pull a push door.*

*Just to say that for a while the 'Rodent translator version 5x' is going to be on...*

Phoebe) Slick.

*Thank you! Anyways...*

 *In the doorway are 3 humans in the sort of suits government agents wear, who've pulled the door off it's hinges. Each have a rodent sitting on their shoulders: A squirrel, a guinea pig and a rat. The squirrel looks at Phoebe the gerbil.*

Squirrel) GET HER!!!!

*Chaos.*

*The agents try to grab Phoebe but she slips under the bed. They pull the bed out of the way (this takes some time as it is a platform) by which time Phoebe has slipped away and is posing as a toy. This doesn't work so she slides though the men's legs and out the door frame, with Hope, Glory and Italics following her.*

Guinea pig) Darn!

Squirrel) Shoot!

Rat) Fu-- hey, look who's here...

*What?! *Gulps**

Rat) You'd better be coming with us mister...

*Aaaagh! Phoebe! Help MEEEEEE...*

Christmas is a coming in...

Glory) Whoo! It's nearly Christmas! I love Christmas! Or Crittermas, as we animals call it.

Phoebe) What were you saying about Crittermas, Glory?

Glory) Crittermas is an animal's equivalent of Christmas. Hope can tell you more.

Hope) Ah yes, Crittermas! It marks the day when a group of animals (rodents I think) got together and decided that animals needed a special winter festival. Weather this happened before or after the human Christmas celebration is unclear, but what happened was that these animals got together a load of gifts and started giving them out to other animals. Now, these gifts were mostly nuts, which weren't so desirable to meat eaters, so the animals went in search of other things to give. They came across cans of paint, which they used to paint patterns on the meat eaters, so that's why they have such colorful coats. That last bit is probably made up.

Phoebe) You're telling me.

Glory) Yes, but the rest is true. And that's why I love Crittermas, 'cause rodents invented it!!

Hope) Well, it's possible, though I expect if you asked a cat they'd say they invented it.

Glory) Eek! CATS!!

*Runs and hides under the table cloth.*

Hope) Every year on Crittermas Eve there's a celebration, which consists mainly of a public gathering. At Crittermas all animals are neutral so even foxes and such come. It's quite cool.

Phoebe) Hope, if I Phase into a gerbil, do you think that I could come?

Hope) Sure!! Pets and all sorts come, so you won't be out of place. I even think S.U.E.A.C and P.A.W.S come to help keep the peace.

Phoebe) Keep the peace?

Hope) Well, y'know, lots of animals in one place, carnivores and herbivores all in the same burrow, things can get a bit... tense. best to be on the alert.

Phoebe) Ah! I understand. Well, I think I'll go. I never sleep well on Christmas Eve anyway.

Italics) Ooh! I wish I could go, but there's a Christmas party at The Italicing Council.

Glory) Wait a sec, it's SNOWING!!

Hope) Whoo!

*Every one runs outside. Bye people!*

Words of Wisdom...

Phoebe) Remember, friends, a gerbil in the hand is worth 2 in the burrow.

Hope) The early bird gets the worm, the late mouse gets the cheese.

Italics) The pun is mightier than the sword.

Glory) People who live in glass houses, should really consider moving, because everyone can see them when their in the bath.

All) Ta da!!

Wow. Impressive.

*Phoebe opens the double doors. There are carpeted stairs going down into what looks like a big amphitheater, and there is a huge portal in the middle. Just then another set of doors open and The Boss and co. come tumbeling in.*

Boss) Quick!! We're being chased! Through the portal!!"

*Everyone starts leaping down the steps and thorough the portal. Phoebe is last. As she looks around she sees Raptor and Reptile Phases charging through the doors. Phoebe gives a yelp and dives through...*

Devic) Deada! Get her!

*...And lands in a heap in the Mammal Phase's HQ.*

Boss) Quick!! Seal it!

*A man runs up and turns some dials on a remote-type-thing. The portal begins to shrink.*

Devic) Aaaagh!! NO! Waaaaaa!

Deada) Grow up...

*The portal closes.*

Phoebe) Phew! Glad that's over!

Glory) Can we go home now?

Boss) Sure, you've helped enough. But first lets have dinner, I'm extremely tired of living on all that over cooked prison food...

*Aah! That's better! After supper everyone is lined up outside another portal. Phoebe is waving goodbye.*

Phoebe) Well, it's been a pleasure meeting you, and good luck on the war! bye bye!!

*She steps through the portal.*

Hope&Glory) BYE!!

*They go through.*

Italics) Bye, Boss!

*He leaps through.*

Boss) You too, Asterisks!

*Oh yeah, bye Boss! Thank you for having me and everything my mum would tell me to say!*

Boss) Bye!

*I step through the portal and it closes.*

*Back at Phoebe's place...*

Phoebe) Hey, it's still the exact same time that we left!

Hope) How fascinating! Time must work differently in that other place.

Glory) Well, that appears to be the end of that saga.

Italics) THE END!!

(For now...)

Oh no, not this AGAIN.

Phoebe) SQUEAK SQUEAK nibble SQUEEEEEEAK!!!!

*She gestures wildly to the lead attacking Phase. The leader is smiling cruelly as he points some sort of lazer at them. The beam stuns them all at once and they black out.*

Lead Phase) Oi! You too!!

*I was just going... zzzzzz...*

*Ow. They wake up to find themselves chained to some pipes sticking out of the wall.*

Phoebe) *Who is now back to human form* Ow... I'm getting more than a little tired of this.

Glory) *Groan* Join the club.

Hope) My head hurts...

Phoebe) Well, we can't just sit here, we have to DO something.

Glory) Hope... I've just had a thought...

Hope) Must be something new to you...

Glory) Didn't you say that sleeping gas was odorless?

Hope) Ye-es...

Glory) Well, we smelled something!

Phoebe) I think it was rust... did the gas come out of pipes?

Hope) It must've... but then that means...

All three) RUSTY PIPES!!

*Phoebe give a really hard shove at the pipe she's on with her shoulder. The pipe cracks.*

Hope) Again! Again!

*Phoebe shoves it again. This time it completely snaps off.*

Phoebe) YES!

*Phoebe starts karare-chopping everyone elses pipes as they come round.*

Italics) *Waking up* Ugh! Hey, Phoebe. Why is it you who's always the first one awake?

Phoebe) Gerbil blood. Come on people, we need to find out where we are.

*They walk along, the passage way steadily getting cleaner. The come to some double doors. Phoebe opens one a crack and looks inside.*

Phoebe)... whoa